Finding true happiness
It’s now been proven that close relationships lead to true happiness, more so than any other indicator. It’ll even lead to good health. Make the time to nurture those relationship. Learn how here.
Do you ever ask yourself what true happiness is? If you have, you’re not alone.
A Harvard study sought to find the secret to true happiness…
In 1938, the Grant Study, one of the longest studies conducted on adult life began. 268 Harvard sophomores were to be observed over an 80 year period to identify the factors that led to happy and healthy lives. Only 19 are still alive, and in their mid 90s.
At the time the study was initiated there were only men in Harvard. Women, as well as people from various socio-economic backgrounds were later recruited into the study.
Across all demographics, one of the biggest surprises was that while taking care of your body is important, relationships and how happy we are in them had a “powerful influence on our health”, said the director of the study, Robert Waldinger, professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School.
They found that close relationships, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, and are the best predictors of long and happy lives…
Close relationships also delayed mental and physical decline more than social class, IQ or genetics; and increased happiness more than money or fame.
This was something I learnt the hard way.
For the first 20 years of my career, I slogged away at being a corporate lawyer…
Initially it seemed to really pay off. By the time I was in my late 20s, I was head of legal for Asia of a global company, and by the time I was turned 41, I had literally achieved all of my career goals. I had managed billions of dollars of transactions, and was well regarded by my peers and in industry.
But I found myself still working as hard. Still in the office for over 12 hours a day.
The satisfaction I thought I would attain, of having achieved every last career goal, wasn’t there… This certainly wasn’t true happiness… And there were no other goals to achieve!
On top of that, worries about retirement set in. With no other career goals to go for, there were no more large increments to be had. Also, being that established in the industry meant that if I were ever made redundant I would be overqualified for most job openings.
I considered various options, include executive MBAs, but didn’t want to go back to school. What would I do after that anyway? Go back to another 12 hour day job?
At that point, I had virtually no relationships outside professional ones. I had spent so much time at work that I neglected friends, and honestly felt more comfortable in the office than at home.
So, I decided I needed to learn to write my own paycheck…
Because I had spent some time working with private equity, I knew what I wanted if I were to invest my time in growing a business.
What really surprised me was that affiliate marketing, checked all the boxes. I would sell other people’s products without needing to hold stock, manage billing etc. I could run a business with virtually no overheads. If I sold a product, I would earn a commission.
This automated business could also be run from home with much less time involvement, which meant I would have time to rebuild my relationships with friends and family.
So I signed up for a course on that, and within 6 months replaced my paycheck.* More importantly, I also rebuilt many important relationships with family members and childhood friends, and during those same 6 months, I also managed to lose 30 pounds, and my blood pressure normalized substantially.
I can tell you from personal experience that the Harvard study is right! Close relationships does affect our health and wellbeing a lot more than most other factors.
Which is why I’m so passionate about helping as many people as possible experience that too. I’ve worked with enough people from all walks of life to know that everyone who wants it, and is prepared to learn and invest in themselves, can live a life of time and financial freedom.
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